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Health & Fitness

No Woman Is an Island: A Little About Me

In which the author introduces herself and describes her unconventional parents, whose example inspires her to not freak out just because she doesn't know what the next steps are on her journey.

I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.” –Lily Tomlin

Since this is my first blog post I will start with a little about me so you will know from whence the thoughts and perspective of future posts is coming. I’m not going to give you a full biography, as I have to maintain a little mystery around here. But suffice to say that my fairly unconventional parents gave me a fairly unconventional childhood, and I am as surprised as anyone to now be a wife, mother of two children, homeowner, and resident of Alameda, which seems to me to be as much like Mayberry USA as is possible in 21st century California. I throw birthday parties for my children with elaborate themes and even scrapbook, fercryingoutloud. The only thing missing is the white picket fence. How did this happen? 

As for what I “do” I am hard-pressed to put a label on it. I was laid off 7 months ago and for the first 5 months of that I was definitely “unemployed.” Now, however, I find myself drifting more towards being a “stay-at-home mom,” although I don’t feel comfortable in either category really. I’ve stepped off the conveyer belt that carried me from college to grad school to career, and I’m trying to figure out my next steps in charting my own new path. I have the luxury of taking my time in this process both financially thanks to my husband bringing home the bacon again and psychologically thanks to the examples that my parents have set.

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My parents both grew up in Manhattan but they didn’t meet until they were about 30 (apparently that city is quite a bit larger than Alameda.) My mother was a “theater person” who was too busy directing and producing shows to settle down. Quite unusually for the time (the 1960s) she didn’t get married until her early 30s and had her first child (me) at 35. Almost 15 years later she found herself in a marriage that wasn’t working out and a job she hated. She decided to take some video classes at Laney College. At age 50, she started a cable access T.V. show, then a few years later she decided to make a film. She completed her first film at age 60, and that film was nominated for an Academy Award for best feature-length documentary. She has made several films since then which she has shown at festivals around the world. Today, as I write this, she is 80 years old and is visiting Jerusalem where she is working 10 – 14 hour days walking around the West Bank with her crew shooting her next film.

My father’s story is equally inspiring, I think. After dropping out of college, he decided to go back to school in his 50s, earning his B.A. at age 60 from Cal State Hayward. Not content with that achievement, he went on to earn a master’s degree and a teaching credential. From age 65 to 70 he taught in the Alameda County Court School in Oakland, which is pretty much the toughest teaching gig there is. He also taught at Diablo Valley Community College and at the Rossmoor retirement community. In addition, he has published articles in scholarly journals and is working on a book. He will be 80 in August and he still teaches at Rossmoor in addition to being a substitute teacher at Alameda’s four high schools (AHS, Encinal, ASTI, and Island High). He also teaches a very popular chess class at his granddaughter’s elementary school.

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So here I am at age 45 with only a vague idea of what I want to do next. But I’m not that worried. When my parents were my age, they had no idea what they would accomplish over the next 30 years.

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