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Politics & Government

'Operation Mom' Gives Alameda Soldier's Mother Focus

The final in a series of interviews with Alameda mothers whose sons have gone to war

 

This is the final story in a thee-part series exploring the impact the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan have had on families in Alameda. Part I, about Renee Kellogg and her son Ryan . Part II, about Jane Fellows, a single mom whose twin sons are in the military . 

Denise Langowski’s 22-year-old son Ryan Garrett enlisted in the U.S. Army right out of high school and entered basic training on the Fourth of July in 2007.

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By age 19, the Encinal High School graduate and ROTC student was committed to the military and had already been deployed to Iraq.

What happened after that, Denise cannot be fully sure. She said her once sweet happy little boy came back from war a grown man who had seen much. She said she doesn’t press him for details. She is just happy he survived. Like other young soldiers, Ryan Garrett had to grow up fast.

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“I’m so proud for him, but at the same time so sad for him,” she said, explaining it is hard to fathom what soldiers his age have had to face in combat. “He was in Iraq for a year,” she said, “he saw a lot of action.”

Her son isn’t the only one who has endured much. Back home his family struggled as they followed the ups and downs of the war’s progress.

“I would either avoid the news altogether or be glued to it,” Langowski said. “Every time the phone would ring my heart would stop,” she said, “I would wonder constantly, is today the day I could get that call that something had happened to him?”

Ryan’s little sister, Samantha (a nine-year-old who attends Donald Lum Elementary School) has grieved over her brother’s absence. She wears his shirt to bed because she says it smells like him and sleeps in his bed for a while each time leaves to return overseas.

“One time when we had to take Ryan back to the airport after a two-week leave Samantha was clinging to him like a vine pleading, “Please don’t go, please don’t die,” Langowski said. “It was heart wrenching.”

She said Ryan had to keep his soldier’s face on, holding back his own emotions as he walked through the airport’s security gate with his little sister still attached to him, trying to hold him back, screaming for him not to leave.

In addition to surviving his tour of Iraq, Ryan also was involved in a bad car crash when his vehicle was hit on Germany’s Autobahn.

“It has not been easy for him,” said his mother, “yet he makes the best of it when he comes home.”

When on leave he goes out of his way to visit his favorite teachers, Mrs. Gill (his second and third grade teacher at Paden Elementary) and Mr. Reis (his band teacher from Wood Middle School).

“It is good to see him,” said his mother of Ryan's return trips home, “but two-week leaves are really cruel. They are here for such a short time and have to go back. It’s tough on everyone.”

A cavalry scout, Ryan is currently stationed in Germany waiting to receive his next orders. It is possible, according to his mother, that he may have to go to Afghanistan next month.

To keep busy and feel she is doing something useful, Langowski has dived into a variety of charitable causes to help the troops, like Operation Mom and Soldier’s Angels.

“It is so important that the troops get care packages and letters,” she said, “There was nothing sadder for my son than being at mail call and seeing guys who didn’t get any mail of their own.”

She was recently involved in packing 160 boxes for Operation Mom filled with “comfort items” to give soldiers. "We shouldn’t forget about the female soldiers over there either,” she said. "They like to get things they may not readily get overseas like body lotion, soap, magazines and things.”

Langowski said she feels good about contributing time to Operation Mom, saying every penny it receives is used to pay for supplies and postage. The Alameda Hospital Auxiliary has made donations to the nonprofit, Alameda dentist Dr. Barrett Parker donated Halloween candy he bought back from his patients, and the Alameda Business Network hosted a fundraiser for the organization.

Langowski says she is happy to pick up donations from Alameda residents and businesses for Operation Mom care packages. You can email her at dlango42@aol.com.

Ryan Garrett will know soon if he will be assigned to Afghanistan. His mother said if he is deployed there it will be for a year, or possibly less. The wait to find out whether he will be sent there has been difficult for the whole family.

When he first enlisted in the army, his mother said, she didn’t want him to go.  But, over time she has come to understand this was something he felt he had to do.

“He always had an interest in the military,” said Langowski. Her own father, who was an Oakland Police officer for 23 years was in the Marine Corps and her younger brother is also a Marine. Lagkowski’s uncle survived Pearl Harbor.

To see a list of items sought by Operation Mom or make a donation on-line you can go here.

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